Brave New World

I had 470 posts in the old blog. Many of them accompanied by pictures unwittingly donated by the fine bodies of Victoria's Secret.

It's very strange to start over, because in many respects, starting over seems largely the task in front of me. Not in the sense that I need to figure out my particular writing style, or what sort of topics I like to explore, or anything like that, but more because my world has greatly changed since I last tried to consistently air my thoughts.

Personally, while I have no doubt changed over the last two years or so, my world is different because the external influences and constraints that I think about daily are worlds different these days.

For the majority of time in the old blog, I was a student with relatively few constraints in terms of what I could write about or what I could post. Culling the pages of Victoria's Secret for new pictures to post, writing erotic stories for kicks, discussing topics that would not pass muster in the more conservative dining rooms - I remember these as mainstays of my previous writing.

Now I spend most of my time in front of a computer at my office, on my employer-provided machine that is supposedly capable of outside monitoring at any time to ensure that my computer use does not violate company policy. I know the Big Brother approach does have certain benefits - you hear scare-tactic stories about people watching porn in their offices for a reason - but as an unfortunate side effect, for blog purposes, it also promotes a heightened sensitivity as to what I feel I can post in terms of looking for pictures online, and to a lesser extent, what ideas I feel comfortable addressing in simple words on my office computer. Moreover, even though I could safely add Vicky's pictures from my home computer, I'll likely view my blog frequently from my office computer, and what with the ever present risk that someone might walk into my office and see a lingerie-clad Marisa Miller posing suggestively on my desktop, I imagine the horrible possibility of a sexual harassment investigation resulting from the new Hose Monster and cringe at the thought.

I have a family now. I have a mortgage, and car payments, and health insurance, and I even have someone who mows my lawn for me. As much as I enjoyed the freedom to blog about everything, at this point I abhor the admittedly remote possibility that I could place my family's livelihood in jeopardy through something so inconsequential as blog content.

It's a different world for me these days, and I hope to find a new way to populate my new blog such that I don't fear the ramifications.